Missing you already- and I haven’t even left

A few months ago I read a scalding blog post from a Mormon man  and other men criticizing women who have small dogs in lieu of children. Even the Pope spoke out against it. This all stemmed from a study. Here is a link to an article about it. http://nypost.com/2014/04/10/more-young-women-choosing-dogs-over-motherhood/

Let’s be clear right here and now. A small dog owns me and I somewhat own him. He blesses my life and I love him completely and stupidly. So my thoughts are some what biased. And as you can tell from the post title I already feel the pain of separation from him and I haven’t even left, so sad. That being said. I want to criticize right on back to every man who blames me for my choices in this.

After graduation I moved in with my parents for a few months. Their dog ended up biting me and putting me in the hospital from it. Sadly, but necessarily, we put him down that day. I still feel scarred from those events but afterwards I knew that I needed a dog in my life again so that I could fully heal. I wanted a dog that would be hypo-allergenic, friendly, and would be content in an apartment. Which ruled out a large dog immediately. I don’t believe that it is fair to have a large dog in an apartment. All of those elements in play I choose a Bichon Frise and yes I got a pure bread- to scared to try and roll the dice like we had with my parents dog. Pip Squeak (aka Pip) has been a wonderful healing process. I also moved out and moved into an apartment by myself. Pip has been a great companion to ease the emptiness of living alone as well as a good little noise maker if someone comes into the apartment.

He makes me laugh and is always so so excited to see me- ridiculously at moments but honestly when your day hits rock bottom it is wonderful to have someone love you so much and express it. Pip has been with me through multiple moves, hospital stays, finding out about some serious tragedy’s including the news that my already sick, type one diabetic mother,  has cancer too. Thankfully it is a non-aggressive form of cancer- for the moment. Yes it will progress but we are managing it better. Needless to say Pip was there for me for that as well. He sleeps on my bed at night and when ever I let him on my lap during the day.

However, I would always choose to have children. I would love to be married to the right guy and to start a family- the key part- to the right guy. The reason that Pip receives so much of my love is that I have not met the right guy yet. I do not need perfect but someone who meshes with me. For most women dogs are not a substitute or replacement but a segue or waiting period for the rest to come. I am supposed to wait to love until that special someone comes into my life? Am I supposed to not have companionship until I find a man who is really the man I need? Heck NO! Hence Pip. I do not think that a man who truly loves me would want me to be lonely while we try to find each other. I believe that in loving Pip I am increasing my capacity to love and to have patience- do men not want that because I sure do and  Pip is like my child right now- I am after all in child bearing years without a kid, but at least I am not married to a child who could not even see all the evidence around him of what is going on.

All of this being said. Do not judge. Do not jump to conclusions that women have a small dog because they do not want kids. For I want a small dog and kids! And do not judge me for leaving him behind for 6 months. I will miss him more that he will miss me. When I got Pip I promised myself and him and I would do everything I could for him to have a happy life (a responsibility for all dog owners) Which is why I am slightly sick inside for leaving him yet I know that he will be super spoiled with “grandma and grandpa” (who will kill me for calling them that in regards to a dog- oh well 🙂 )

Finally I will also really miss spending time with my parents. Especially my mother who is sick but is also my best friend. We have spent a lot of time together and I will miss her- but with skype everyday I will be fine and I started this blog (with a .com site) so that she could follow my adventures,  Leaving her will be hard but especially because she is sick. However as she wants me to do this, perhaps even more than I want it for myself I love her for it, I will go! With all of this change there are many things that I will miss and am missing and I haven’t even left yet.

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